Rejection in the acting world is a guarantee. For every job you book, you may have 100 rejections. You’ve heard the cliché to “have a thick skin” — as if you can just pick it up at the convenience store. The truth is, rejection hurts, and if left unchecked, it can do a number on your mental well-being. Not to mention, it may discourage you from continuing to act.
In Part II of Mental Health for Actors: A Survival Series, we discussed emotional recovery after heavy roles and how to create a personal “come down” routine. In this article, we’ll tackle rejection head-on and share mental health strategies; diving into real, actionable strategies that help actors bounce back stronger.
Insights: Quick Tips for Handling Rejection
- Instead of internalizing rejection as failure, reframe it as the role not being right for you and use each audition as a learning experience, jotting down reflections in a journal.
- Keep a Wins Journal to document small victories and a Growth Log to recognize personal development, which helps maintain motivation and focus on growth rather than just bookings.
- Develop a support network of understanding peers, establish post-audition rituals to clear your mind, and engage in mindfulness practices like meditation and digital detox to manage stress and maintain well-being.
Rejection is Inevitable — and it’s Not Personal
Rejection is not a verdict on your talent. It’s often a reflection of variables you have no control over. Casting is a puzzle, and actors are just one piece. Sometimes you’re too tall. Or you remind the director of their ex.
Did you know that Meryl Streep was told she wasn’t “pretty enough” for King Kong? Viola Davis wasn’t cast in major roles until her 40s. Jon Hamm didn’t land Mad Men until after a decade of failed auditions. The common denominator in their careers is that they didn’t treat rejection as an insult but as an intersection. Use rejection to pivot and keep going.
Reframing the Narrative
How often have you cried or shoved chocolate down your throat after finding out you didn’t get the part? It’s natural to spiral and think that you’re not good enough. It’s what you tell yourself after hearing “no” that will either strengthen or sabotage you.
Instead of saying, “I wasn’t right for the role,” say, “The role wasn’t right for me.” It’s a subtle shift, but it puts the power back in your hands. Instead of being judged, you’re letting go of something that doesn’t align.
Now’s your chance to take out that journal that someone gave you as a gift and start making quick entries after every audition:
- What went well?
- What felt off?
- What can I do differently next time?
You should see every audition as an opportunity, a lesson or even just as practice, because one day, “no” will lead to a “yes.” Then, you’ll go back through your notes to determine what you did to get that “yes.” Remember to repeat the journaling practice because our brains are wired to believe what’s repeated.
The Power of the “Wins Journal”
In that same journal, you should also log the small, positive stuff. Nothing fancy or flashy, think:
- Got a callback
- The casting director remembered me
- Nailed the emotional beat in that self tape
- Didn’t self-criticize after watching playback
Document every little “yes” because these micro-wins add up. More importantly, they keep you going. Did you know that studies in positive psychology show that tracking wins boosts dopamine, the brain’s reward chemical?
Celebrating Growth, Not Just Bookings
As actors, we need to get better at measuring progress. You should not just validate yourself when you book a gig, as you may be setting yourself up for emotional distraction. Instead, know that an acting career is full of false starts and surprising breakthroughs.
Growth in the entertainment field could be slow; you’re building a business, after all! That’s why you want to create a Growth Log — a companion to your Wins Journal. Here, you track the intangible stuff:
- Finally trusted my instincts in that improv class.
- Tried a bold choice, even though I was scared.
- Learned how to slate with more confidence.
Shifting your focus to effort-based metrics allows you to stay empowered, be present for the craft and cultivate your career.
Building a Supportive Circle
An actor’s journey can be lonely. Friends and family may ask you when you’ll get a real job to the point that you no longer wish to discuss your career goals with them. Instead, surround yourself with people who get it. You can find support in acting classes, industry mixers and online groups.
Better yet, create “rejection rituals” with your acting friends. Celebrate your bravery, not the outcome.
- Did you get ghosted after a big audition? Get ice cream together.
- Didn’t book that co-star role? Go for a vent walk.
- Did you miss a callback? Rewatch your favorite scene of yourself and remind each other how far you’ve come. (Okay, make sure you don’t miss a callback unless there’s an emergency.)
There is life beyond the lens. It’s also healthy to have friends outside of the industry — those who see you as a whole person, not just a performer. You deserve relationships that nurture your career.
Mindfulness, Wellness and Reset Tools
Any type of rejection can take a toll on the nervous system. Your body reacts with tension and your thoughts spiral. It’s as if your body is at war with your mind.
Here are some reset tools that help you bounce back:
Meditation & Breathwork
Apps like Headspace or Insight Timer offer quick guided meditations specifically for anxiety and emotional resilience. Even just a few minutes of focused breathing can calm your nervous system and re-center you before or after an audition.
Movement
Don’t underestimate the power of walking, dancing or stretching. Physical activity boosts endorphins and gives your brain something else to focus on besides the rejection.
Digital Detox
This will be hard, but you can do it! Permit yourself to step away from social media. Constantly checking for audition results or comparing yourself online only adds fuel to the fire.
Audition Detox Ritual
Create a post-audition ritual that clears your energy. Light a candle. Journal. Watch a comfort show. Make it sacred. Make it yours.
Revisit Your “Why”
Keep a note in your phone: “Why I Act.” Fill it with quotes, memories and personal affirmations. Re-read it when the world says “no” to remind yourself why you keep saying “yes.”
Rejection Doesn’t Define You — Resilience Does
Don’t let rejection steal your joy. You’re more than your bookings, more than your audition count.
You are an (drum roll please) … artist! Artists keep showing up even when the rest of the world is sleeping. The trick is:
- To build a system that supports your spirit.
- A Wins Journal to track your progress.
- A Growth Log to celebrate your bravery.
- A community to laugh (and cry) with.
- A ritual that honors your effort, even in silence.
The next time you hear “no,” don’t hear “never.” Say, “Onto the next one!”
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